I am #prettyenough because….

Is something on my forehead?

I am enough because…

1. I own who I am. If I mess up I acknowledge it, learn from it, and move forward.

2. The people who are close to me accept me (even when I mess up) and love me through it. Those are the people I care about it. If you don’t like me, it’s not because I’m “not enough.” It’s because I’m not your cup of tea. And that’s Ok. Because we’re probably not going to drink tea together anyway.

3. Even if I don’t feel particularly “pretty,” I don’t use “pretty” as the main source of my identity.



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  • Johnny

    I will be able to write volumes if I were to count the number of times girls have told me that I am not tall enough!!

    • Jennifer Tress

      I understand! I’m married to a short guy and he sometimes laments this fact. Feel free to share more, if you wish. We love to discuss this stuff!

      • Johnny

        There are way too many instances of personal experiences to list and they are humiliating. However, as men we are expected to suck it up and not complain. On the contrary media, bloggers need to show restrain and empathy when voicing their opinions such the following article which outwardly seems innocuous however, has condescending and offensive undertones.
        The author basically condones stereotypes and body (size) shaming as long as it’s directed towards men. She makes a feeble attempt in the end to redeem herself however, the entire article talks about how it’s OK for women to shame men and question their masculinity based on height. Here is a simple test to see if the article is offensive or not. Replace every word “man” by “woman” and every adjective “short” with “fat”!

        • Jennifer Tress

          You bring up some great points. Men are expected to suck it up, no doubt. And that can feel like prison. I do feel like that’s changing; little by little men are sharing their experiences and feelings around this (like you’re doing here, there’s a subreddit devoted to men who don’t feel “attractive enough”, etc.) I agree that the author of that Ms. blog post did a poor job, and mostly proved what we already know: many people are shallow. That also sucks. But it’s not everyone. I promise (I know, small comfort when you’re in the thick of it). Re: women not defending men in this area, two things: first, I think women tend to focus more on issues impacting women because that’s the experience we know (obviously). And historically women are more often the target of derogatory messages in the media, and more often held up to ridiculous beauty standards. In turn, we also more often come out loudly in response to these issues (like the a scooby doo movie) because, like you’ve mentioned, it’s somewhat more acceptable societally for us to express our emotions. Can we as women do more to defend men against standards of beauty? Yes. But what would be more powerful is to have men (such as yourself) rally and speak up about your experiences. Because you’re the only ones who can properly express what that experience feels like. What if you wrote a piece about this and put it out there? I’d be happy to help you through that…

          • Johnny

            Actually it’s not true, men have been derided by women equally for their physical imperfections. See the article posted on a feminist site which under normal circumstances would cry out against body shaming against women however, body shaming men is a fair game.
            Even though lack of height shouldn’t be considered an imperfection because beauty is absolute. For example, an overweight person is unattractive no matter if the person who is judging is overweight or not. By same virtue, a short man should be attractive no matter whether the woman is taller or not. However, it seems like a six foot man may be attractive to a 5’5” woman but not attractive to a 6’2” woman doesn’t make any sense. However, a 400 lbs man is unattractive to a woman who is 100lbs or 300lbs.

      • Johnny

        I just read about all women going nuts over Scooby doo curse article. However, the men are still held to the ridiculous Disney prince standards, quoting from the article below, “Disney princesses do not marry the short guy. Hetero couples where the man is shorter often get mocked”, basically condoning discrimination towards short guys. There are definitely double standards in play here. Unless women start defending men against such stereotypes and treat them equally no one is going to take these indignations seriously.